29 Jul 2011

Birkin diplomacy

Yesterday the Alligators called emergency session of their pressure group NSOMB – No Skin Of My Back. The Snakes were present and so were the Crocodiles. The Beavers were special invitees.

“What have you called us here for ?” the Snake asked.

“Haven’t you read the news? The Pakistani foreign minister carried a Birkin handbag to the Indo- Pak meet.” said the Alligator.

“So?” asked the Crocodile.

“Well apparently the meeting was a huge success. Everyone is attributing it to Birkin diplomacy. The Indian media is all excited about it.”

“This is good news for Birkin. They will sell a couple of more bags in India. How does this concern us?” the Snake said pointedly.

“Hillary Clinton has taken note of this trend and ordered 300 bags. She will gift it to women leaders all over the world. She feels that no two countries with leaders carrying Birkin will go to war. If there is a crisis, they will just hold a summit and discuss the latest trends in handbags.

There was pause as the Snake and the Crocodile looked at each other.

“Birkin has already ramped up its production. The first bags are scheduled to be delivered in the UN session in September” the Alligator continued.

The Beaver looked around and smiled.

“So why did you call me for this session?”

The Alligator turned to look at him.

“ Did you think that men were going to carry handbags? Not to be left out, the Indian foreign Minister has ordered a beaver hat from Birkin for the next Indo-Pak summit. Now the Chinese delegation to the UN is demanding beaver hats too.”

“But so many bags and hats are going to cost at least 10 million dollars. Who is going to foot the bill?” argued the Crocodile.

“That’s a small price to pay for world peace.” muttered the Alligator.

“What can we do ?” asked the Beaver.

“Pray that some crazy from Norway or Iraq detonates a bomb and the world is distracted by a War on Terror for another ten years.” said the Snake.

Birkin Diplomacy - To use a fashion accessory to distract from the real issue


Heatseeker said...

Stop this Bvlagrity, you are Birkin up the wrong tree ..... ha ha

Life@60 said...

Tongue in cheek, typical of you. Gud one.

Alyson said...

hehehe - so cleverly written!