How to be a 100% dilliwalah (Suggestion No. 8)

Use the Metro. Once.

Now you can pretend to be an ultracoolenvironmentfriendly type who cares about climate change and all that crap. The next time you meet your friends at Barista you must keep talking about the METRO RIDE.

First of all you must mention the walk to the station. Since it was Sunday (who in their right minds would take the Metro on any other day) there was no traffic and birds were singing in the air etc etc. Then the spic and span station. Very few people, no traffic jams.

Now you move to the platform. Everyone (all the five commuters on a Sunday morning) waited politely. There was no pushing. Also add a bit about how there was so much space in the train. Your ride can be for any purpose - shopping or going to a historical monument. The grander the idea the better. It could be to spend time with nature - therefore you went to central park in CP. Or it could be that you wanted to taste authentic Mughlai khana and decided to go to Karim’s.

Every time you look up from your car at the Metro line above, another story about the ride you never had should pop up in your mind. If you change your destination this story can be recycled (environment friendly) anywhere - college, parties or while standing in the line for milk at Mother Dairy. One real ride will suffice for a lifetime of stories since the rest of the gang will be hiding the fact that they rarely use the Metro.

This story could also be recounted at a business meeting. There was a time when you could mention Delhi’s history or food and pass off as a superior city. Not anymore. Now you have to mention the Metro. There is nothing like people from Mumbai, Bangalore or Gurgaon squirming in their seats when you tell them how Delhi is a step ahead. (Forget a step ahead - Mumbai can't even get to decide how they are going to build it - the soil keeps collapsing on them).

But with this group you need have your facts. Visit this blog on the Delhi Metro for regular updates. How the metro helps save commuting time. How many people use it everyday. Look at the projections for 2010. Never mind that by 2010 you will have a Pajero and will never ride the Metro.

You may not have a successful meeting. But for some vague reason you will walk out feeling superior.